| (no subject) |
[Feb. 20th, 2007|11:28 am] |
This is my third semester of college and I have concluded that GRCC isn't going to get me any closer to the thing I want most in life... swimming with whales. Cigarettes make me gag. Diet Coke also makes me gag but it's the only thing that's keeping me going right now. I put on makeup last night for the first time in awhile just to help me feel a little better about myself. I feel find but it's always good feeling pretty.
Trent is beautiful and I love him more than life itself. I know a lot of you are probably like (what a douche bag, but you know what... eff you, I love him).
So what's been going on for the past two months, well, I'll tell you. Schools a bitch, works alright, and my social life could use a little more excitement but I have no drive to go anywhere because being alone or with Trent makes my life complete. My dad moved out and I'm not for sure how long this time but he's been gone for about three days now and I haven't heard anything from him. I'm really sad about it but at the same time I just couldn't deal with his midlife crisis or whatever it is that's been going on to complicate our father/daughter relationship. He's my dad and I'll always love him and I know he has good intentions but sometimes he needs to chill out.
Also, there's been a rumor going around the city of Newaygo that I spent time in the slammer. I have to admit for a while I was straying away from the "right" path (whatever that is) but before I let anything get out of control I stepped back and realized that it's not worth the risk to be around somewhere that might get "busted" or underage drinking. I'm not quite sure why people think I went to jail but I assure, I haven't. The closest thing to a runin with the cops was a loooooooooong time ago and there was nothing that I could get in trouble for, I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. Dumb people who work at dairy queen and have nothing better to do with THEIR boring lives insist on ruining my good name and my good reputation. Other dumb people who don't realize that the people spreading this lies I don't associate with in any way, shape, or form (not even mutual friends) and instead of going straight to the source to find out the TRUTH about me, they assume that it's true and turn the other shoulder when I'm around because apparently I'm "bad news". Anyways, it's childish and the reason I don't talk to many people is to stay away from anything that could give ANYONE a bad image of me. So I'd really like it if people wouldn't pull things out of thin air to slander my good name. That's illegal, by the way.
Well, I suppose I'll step off my soap box and get on with my "schooling." (which isn't really benefiting my future anyhow). |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2006|06:02 pm] |
I haven't kept up on this in a long while, so I will do that now.
I'm oh so excited for this semester of school to be over. Final projects have been a bitch, but the exams have been a breeze. I'm going to miss the people in my spanish class dearly because everyone in that class gets along so well, it's not like a college course at all. I definately look forward to it, too bad it's so early in the morning. I'll be SO glad for Business Sales to be over because it's easy but the work is incredibly tedious. Film Viewing class, well, what can I say about that. It's dumb. Incredibly stupid.
Work is wonderful. I love my job (even if it isn't very rewarding) but the people I work with definately like me and are greatful for me. Erin tells me everytime I work how much she loves me lol. The only downfall is lack of hours and the other baggers are retarded, lazy high schoolers. After a while though Michael might move me up to cashier (so I'm just going to keep my fingers crossed).
Trent and I have been getting along so well that it doesn't even seem real. I love spending time with him. I haven't laughed and smiled this much in a long time. Last night's snowball fight was insane. My dad finally accepts that I'm going to be with him because he makes me happy, even if he does or doesn't do things he shouldn't or should.
Dan and Lee come home soon. That's going to be worth so much to me when they do. I haven't seen my good buddy Dan since December and to be honest, I miss that boy a little too much. Matt's already home and boy was I glad to see him. When he's gone I don't think too much about it but when he's back I remember what crazy and fun times we have. Corie, Matt, and I all got to hang out (Johnathon, Trent, Corey, and Sammie were there, too) but it was just like old times but with more nuts in my pants and definately a lot more drawing with black permanent marker. When Matt, Dan, or Lee comes home it's always a reminder of how fun and carefree life used to be. Dan and Lee need to hurry up and get their arses home. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 4th, 2006|09:47 pm] |
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I have the most beautiful boyfriend. He makes me happy. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 10th, 2006|03:53 am] |
esotericfire2787 (11:50:38 PM): next time you have class start touching yourself right then and there
esotericfire2787 (11:50:44 PM): masturbate, staring straight into his eyes
esotericfire2787 (11:50:44 PM): hahaha
concretekatey (11:50:45 PM): HAHAHAHA
concretekatey (11:50:51 PM): that's terrible!
concretekatey (11:50:56 PM): but i can't stop laughing
concretekatey (11:50:59 PM): and it hurts my chest even more
esotericfire2787 (11:51:23 PM): when he says something just scream, "WHO'S MENTAL NOW BITCH?!"
*** And this is why Elizabeth Marshall deserves the world. Man she cracks me up! |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 3rd, 2006|01:17 am] |
It seems like Stewie is stroking his genitalia more than usual (referring to my icon). Anyways...
So, I'm not sure how to put this without sounding "obsessed" but, I'm having feelings for a boy. Pretty strong feelings. I don't know, I'm still unsure of anything. It wouldn't be smart to just jump into anything... but he sure is adorable.
Also, I helped Staci move into her new "house". She says she won't be there long... I don't know
Also, Liz Marshall needs to show her face to MEEEEEEE!
Also, I miss my brother and corie dearly. I haven't seem them in a long time. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 22nd, 2006|11:43 am] |
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AHHHHHH... I'm tired. I love hanging out with liz marshall. She's a cool cat and all that beez-nas! Skip it is hard. Very hard. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 1st, 2006|07:59 pm] |
Wow. It's been a long time. Let's see. So, I'm back in Michigan. I miss Florida.
But, being here I get to be with my best friend, rekindled the friendship with my old best friend in high school, and get to be with my brother before he leaves on HIS big adventure in Pennsylvania. Mine's cooler... I know. Anywho, So life hasn't been a total bust being back. Although, it is hard with abiding by parental rules, being without some of the coolest people ever, and only having dial up internet now. Yeah. That place definately had it's perks.
I'm about to scramble to the kitchen for some advil and a glass of water. This incrediculous heat is driving me insane! It wasn't even this hot in Florida. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2006|03:20 pm] |
People from different countries are cute. My new roommate from Russia brought three of her Russian friends over for some tea. They're all sitting around a table, sipping their tea, and talking in Russia. I'm sitting on the couch with my headphones on listening to Mary J. Blige because I don't understand Russian and they don't understand much english, so to attempt at social interaction would be pointless as it has been the past few days that I tried.
The girl from Scottland is super nice and super cool. I definately like that new roommate. Too bad I won't get to know her that well. Symone is nice, too. We get along great. My new roommates are pretty neat. Definately unique.
How many people can say they lived with a Russian and Scottish girl at the same time... Probably not that many people. Well, I'm off to do my hair.
.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 22nd, 2006|01:37 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bored | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The Kill - 30 Seconds to Mars | ] |
so I'm one step closer to coming home. I set up reservations for a hotel room for my mother, cousin, and aunt. Yeah 50% discount on a nice hotel! I'm so cool sometimes.
I have to put my two weeks in online, too. You have to do everything online now these days. It's kinda stressful. So, I'm having my manager teach me how to do it today.
There was a lizzard on my apartment wall last night. Ick. The neighbor boy caught it and threw it onto me. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 21st, 2006|02:27 pm] |
Ouch... I have the stomach flu.
These minutes are going by so slowly. I just want to hurry up and get today over with. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 20th, 2006|04:01 am] |
What if I wanted to fight, beg for the rest of my life. What would you do?
You say you wanted more, what are you waiting for? I'm not running from you.
Come break me down... bury me bury me. I am finished with you.
Look in my eyes. You're killing me killing me. All I wanted was you.
I try to be someone else, but nothing seemed to change and I know now... this is who I really am inside.
Finally found myself.
Come break me down. Bury me bury me. I am finished with you you you.
Look in my eyes. You're killing me killing me. All I wanted was you.
Come break me down. Break me down. Break me down.
What if I wanted to break? What if I... what if I... Bury me... Bury me. |
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| The end of an incredible adventure... |
[Jun. 14th, 2006|02:34 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  melancholy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Righteous Brothers - You've lost that love and feeling | ] |
I can't wait to get back home into the swing of things. I can't wait to ride with my dad and listen to classic rock and talk about my adventure. I can't wait to get home and watch a movie with my mom while eating cheese popcorn and drinking chocolate milk. I can't wait to get home and have a bonfire with my brother and our closest friends, Corie and Staci. I can't wait to get home and sit out in the garage with my dad and his buddies, Irv and Gary listening to classic rock and listen to their talk about cars and the good ol' days. I can't wait to get back home and go for a bike ride with Lee out to Staci's and sit in her drive way with her new puppy and her new love and talk about the good ol' days. I can't wait to get back home and hang out with Paul and see how much he's changed. But, most importantly, I can't wait to get home and start my new adventure.
I'm going to miss going to Disney World for free and ride a couple rides and just go home. I'm going to miss going to Ale House and meeting up with Ryan Lester, Jon, and the rest of the coaster cast. I'm going to miss walks and talks with Jon in the Celebration Park. I'm going to miss going to PI with my roommates and having Jenna do my makeup and hair before we leave. I'm going to miss the random house party with lots of dancing and singing into ladles. I'm going to miss meeting a new person everyday. I'm going to miss late night trips to Perkins, Steak-n-Shake, and Ale House after work.
I already miss working with Danelle, playing with Randall, and staying the night at Jon's house. I miss 3107. I miss going out with Alex and Jessica and Jon and being completely awesome. But, mostly... I'm going to miss Jon. Why? Because he made me realize something about myself.
He's made me realize that it's possible for me to have a healthy relationship. He made me remember that a relationship is more than physical. He made me remember that I can care for someone and only that someone. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 1st, 2006|11:52 pm] |
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It's sad that you are an old friend and that the first time I talk to you we talk for an hour and forty minutes because we keep losing touch. But, it gives me comfort in the heart to know that it's so easy to be friends with you after all these years and all the crap that we put ourselves through. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 29th, 2006|02:38 pm] |
Everyone's been writing about their dates that they're going on tonight so I'll write about mine tonight as well. Tonight Jon and I are working together! I'm so excited. We can watch the sun set at fast pass return and greeter and we close merge together. There's nothing more romantic than dumping the fast passes into the trash at the end of the night...
*sigh*... I wish someone would do something romantic for me sometime. We're at the happiest place on earth and he won't even take me out on a fucking date. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 15th, 2006|03:27 am] |
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so i had a wonderful day. then i came back to this apartment. this godforsaken apartment. every mother fucking time i'm here SOMEthing goes wrong and then i remember why i choose NOT to live here. the last time i was up until 6 in the morning dealing with druken stupid roommates because they decided to fight each other. then the next night seemed like a good night until i tried to sleep. my roommate doesn't stop talking and has no respect for my when i'm trying to sleep. then tonight i'm here and all the sudden there's a loud commotion outside so i, being in the topless state i am decide to just go out with a blanket around me and wonder why there's some guy i've never seen before and a midget standing in my living room. turns out, my roommate alex has spilled her dinner over half of the hallway and is laying in it. me not knowing what to do in a situation like this run and get crystal because all four of them have had their head in the toilets from too much drinking.. me... never. they can take care of each other in the situations like these. where i kind of felt bad getting crystal up to deal with alex, i didn't remain that way. when i saw alex throwing up on her tshirt on the living room floor crystal holding up her head and me holding the basket, reminded that i just got out of my great sleep, my living room smells like vomit, and i have to be to work for a twelve and a half hour shift tomorrow, i suddenly didn't feel so bad. because... honestly, i would've left her our there myself. i could've gone to jon's tonight, we had a good day, and we spent a lot of time together but i decided that after last night he needed his space, so i came home. this must be an ongoing thing here... but i refuse to be woken up by anymore fights, drunken vomitting, and little gnomes in my living room, and i refuse to clean up anybody's vomit on my living room floor. and most importantly, i refuse to wake up a couple hours early to make sure that my roommate makes it to work on time because she's on her last point and she'll be termed if she's late for work. this is bogus. pure fucking bogus. i can't WAIT until i can come home. it's more comforting when my mother and father are sitting quietly in the living room watching their shows than it is wondering which roommate's going to come home drunk tonight and that i have to lock my door to make sure that strange people don't come into MY room while i'm sleeping. back to the locker you go helena... we can't risk them puking all over you my dear... you're much to expensive for this shit. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 9th, 2006|05:53 am] |
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Okay. So, I haven't updated in a while. Florida's good. Friend's are cool. Jon's alright. I miss home. I'm sick. |
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| Tell me this isn't relative... |
[Apr. 14th, 2006|02:08 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | White Houses - Vanessa Carlton | ] |
Dear Liz and Staci,
I miss the both of you. This song reminds me of you two, me, and Ricki. Would you not agree? I miss you girlies. Can't wait for when I come home.
Crashed on the floor when I moved in
This little bunk alone with some strange new friends
Stay up too late, and I'm too thin
We promise each other it's til the end
Now we're spinning empty bottles
It's the five of us
With pretty eyed boys girls die to trust
I can't resist the day
No, I can't resist the day
Jenny screams out and it's no pose
'Cause when she dances she goes and goes
Beer through the nose on an inside joke
I'm so excited, I haven't spoken
And she's so pretty, and she's so sure
Maybe I'm more clever than a girl like her
The summer's all in bloom
The summer is ending soon
It's alright and it's nice not to be so alone
But I hold on to your secrets in white houses
Maybe I'm a little bit over my head
I come undone at the things he said
And he's so funny in his bright red shirt
We were all in love and we all got hurt
I sneak into his car's black leather seat
The smell of gasoline in the summer heat
Boy, we're going way too fast
It's all too sweet to last
It's alright
And I put myself in his hands
But I hold on to your secrets in white houses
Love, or something ignites in my veins
And I pray it never fades in white houses
My first time, hard to explain
Rush of blood, oh, and a little bit of pain
On a cloudy day, it's more common than you think
He's my first mistake
Maybe you were all faster than me
We gave each other up so easily
These silly little wounds will never mend
I feel so far from where I've been
So I go, and I will not be back here again
I'm gone as the day is fading on white houses
I lie, put my injuries all in the dust
In my heart is the five of us
In white houses
And you, maybe you'll remember me
What I gave is yours to keep
In white houses
In white houses
In white houses |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 9th, 2006|01:24 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  nervous | ] |
Today was one of those days that started out great and then gradually became... not so good. Well, I've made lots of knew friends, no doubt about that. I love them all dearly and we always have a good time. So... I'm always happy now. Well, Danelle and I had a great time tasking, in studio B, and during the VIP tour. So... for all ride it was going to be great and we were going to take a great picture. Danelle didn't hold onto the hard hat good enough and it flew off and his another cast member in the nose. I'm scared... I could get fired... the lady wants me fired. Because it was MY idea, and even though Ryan okayed and the manager (who was there) didn't mind us doing it and thought it to be in good fun (because it's been done before), and even though I held onto my helmet tight enough and Danelle didn't, I could still get fired. And... yes, I feel terrible about what happened. I do... but I don't think I would want someone fired if i was in that position. But... I really enjoy work, all my friends, and just... this whole experience in general. I COULD get fired for this. Not this specifically... but for reprimands. I have two attendance and that is not good to have when I just need one more to get fired. I'm nervous... oh so nervous. I was thinking about it... if I had to leave and was never welcome back... I would be devastated. I have great friends back home to go to... but the only thing I have at home waiting for me (career wise) is Dairy Queen. I couldn't go back now having the experience I have and be content with that. I'm oh so scared about this. I already have a plan for when it is time to come home. Go to school, get an apartment, room with staci, and get a seasonal job at disney, come visit my friends while I'm down here working for a week every six months. That is amazing. I love it here and I intend to come back. If i get fired... I couldn't come back. Soo... what to do what to do. I never thought having fun at work could cause this much trouble. I'm deeply saddened by this. I am trying to stay positive and what not... I'm just worried. |
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